For several years I have been using a technique created by Julia Cameron (1992) in her book, The Artist’s Way, to help draw out my creative spirit and find my authentic voice. Essentially, morning pages is a journaling activity aimed at cracking through the messy blocks of our spiritual creative self by writing through the muck that keeps our voices stuck (9-10). By through, I mean writing three pages every morning despite the lack of words or grace. Sometimes, it is literally copying the “blah, blah, blahs” bit by bit from your thoughts for an entire page until something that resembles fluid motion takes it’s foot, dripping with mud and mire, and tears it up and over the puddles to walk on much dryer land.
But along the way I have had personal life complications, and now when I sit down and try to journal I am lucky to get even a paragraph, let alone three pages of muck. I do still feel the creative tug to write an impressionable poem, and I continue to muddle my way through the facts of my non-fiction writing, but the spirited energy I had for my work is currently buried in the tranquilizing medications that help me in other parts of my life. So what do I do about this?
First of all, Cameron insists that it is imperative to use morning pages to recover creativity. She addresses the “Censor” and the momentum that bypasses this censor when we move from our morning bed to page (11). I move through this process and still find utter silence, or pages and pages of planning my day, but no intelligible insight. I question whether I am really a writer? Cameron answers this as well,
“Over any considerable period of time, the morning pages perform spiritual chiropractic. They realign our values. If we are to the left or the right of our personal truth, the pages will point out the need for a course adjustment. We will become aware of our drift and correct it – if only to hush the pages up.” (80)
I ask myself, what does the silence tell me? I do not believe it tells me I am not a writer. To write, to tell a story, to speak a poem, to teach through love and sweat and tears – that has been my life-long ambition. These are my values. So I ask myself where the course adjustment begins? Well, I think I should call them My Evening Pen.
I’ve created various versions of blogs and websites in the past and love the creative feel of connecting pieces of my reaching web of interests into one space. I have nothing to hide. I value honesty, kindness, and simplicity. Regardless of Roots is meant to be about accessibility and tolerance and the human spirit (and much more, read my poem Raven Who Stole the Diamond). I write about these topics often, and would like to connect with the world with a more personal touch.
I am hoping My Evening Pen will give me new creative insight into the various projects that I work on. From writing a book of non-fiction, a book of poetry, to working through a university degree in Religion and Anthropology, I hope to cut through the muck and see the world clearly through the eyes of humanity (as opposed to ignorance). There will be different experiences here, and I welcome you to travel with me for the next leg of my life adventure.
References:
Cameron, Julia. 2002. The Artist’s Way: a spiritual path to higher creativity. New York: Penguin Putnum Inc.
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